PLAY ROTODERBY NOW | CHEATSHEETS: EXCEL 2010 | EXCEL 2003 | PDF
As the season approaches, I get a little too psyched. Today, I took out the ole baseball cards and rifled through them stopping at cards that made me smile. When I found a 1969 Johnny Bench Rookie Card, I just had to know exactly how much it was worth. It was worth $50. As I started to look at all these old cards, I realized two things: (1) I FREAKING LOVE BASEBALL; (2) I have a lot of $50 bills in my closet.
I pulled out Topps baseball cards from 1968 to 1995 and relived my childhood. Something weird happened though, I also relived my early 20s. Suddenly, it was 1989, back at IBM’s PRODIGY building Baseball Manager and then in 1991 fighting with the draft Gods to get make sure I drafted the Big Hurt. So I looked at all the great players: Tom Terriffic, The Hammer, The Hawk, The Big Unit, Lefty. Hated that I had to wear glasses in order to see the mouse type stats on the backs of the cards, but it really brought me back. I love my baseball cards. I even took them to college with me. Weird I know, but for me, what a great morning.
Then, as the coffee flowed, it got better. I got an email from a friend showing me that my latest obsession, Roto Derby was “guaranteeing” their prizes. Funny, I immediately thought of a Val Kilmer movie from 1985 called Real Genius. Obscure, yes, but I thought of Lazlo. The point is that in this movie, Chris Knight (Kilmer) is a college scientist working on a laser project with grant money only to find out that the lasers are to be used for well, not great means. He is comedic and finds a way to spoil everything and make all his friends happy. Hollywood ending. Break out a house full of popcorn and watch it. Fun and Funny stuff.
“Rue the day?” Who talks like that?
So back to Lazlo. Chris Knight has a rocket science roommate who lives below their dorm room in a mysterious dungeon. Through the whole movie he just keeps coming through with boxes and boxes of sweepstakes entries. Everyone thinks he is crazy. SPOILER ALERT: At the end of the movie, Lazlo, rides up in a new vehicle. When asked where he got it, he explains that he had calculated that with the number of entries he submitted, he should win 1/3rd of the prizes. When asked, he says that he won 38.6% of the prizes.
This morning when I went through my cards, I pulled out a handful of Cardinals cards to send to a good friend who is a red bird fan and likes to display cards of his fantasy baseball team in his office. I am sending them because I like to share.
So in that spirit, I want to share RotoDerby since your chances of winning have increased dramatically. Here is what you need to succeed:
Now back to the movies and baseball cards circa 1985. Found an old St. Louis Cardinal card of Terry Pendleton and my first instinct was to rip it up, so I did. Then I found them all and ripped them all up. His home run in 1987 vs my Metropolitans wrecked my fall and my Pontiac. Impulsive maybe, but when I feel something and I want to do it, sometimes I just do it. My whole life I have surrounded myself with smart people. One thing I have noticed is that many of them decide everything they do. I like to just do. That is what I love about Chris Knight in Real Genius perfectly set in this quote.
“Look at it this way. Considering the type of people you are and the environment you're in, you have to admit the strong possibility this may be the only chance you ever have in your entire lives... to have sex.”