Ugh. From the moment you come to, it’s all just one big disaster. Everything is foggy, everything is loud, you have no concept of time, and nothing makes sense at the moment. Your eyes are a mess and the only thing that rivals the size of the eye-boogers that are working as a sealant because you fell asleep with your contact lenses in is the amount of wool that was obviously used in the sweaters that are now covering your teeth. Like I said, it’s one big disaster once you come to. So goes life when you go out on a Saturday night and party with Ray Flowers at a club that seems to be running a clearance sale on vodka and Red Bull.

What? Oh crap. Wait. I’m sorry. Wrong article. Well, right article, just the wrong site. Like I said, nothing makes sense even two days later. This is Fantasy Alarm and the Morning After that we’re talking here is all fantasy football related. My bad. We’re covering some of the nightmares and disasters from NFL Week 10, not re-hashing the misadventures of a married guy with a low threshold for alcohol tolerance playing wingman to The Oracle himself. That part will have to wait.

For now, it’s about helping you along in the fantasy football season as losses hurt ten times more than the headache I’ve had for two days running and a win is….well, a win is as glorious as Ray actually scoring a girl’s phone number. So let’s catch up with some of the more important NFL news items and the fantasy ramifications.

The Eifert Tower

When Jermaine Gresham suffered a setback last week from his recent groin injury and was declared inactive for Week 10, it opened up a window of opportunity for Tyler Eifert that fantasy owners have had a hankering for since the season started. With the primary job all to himself, Eifert saw a season-high 10 targets which was great to see. Unfortunately, he came down with just three catches, but he did rack up 55 yards. Now, obviously, we’re not looking at seven drops here as there were other reasons for the miscues, so let’s just focus on the number of targets. Andy Dalton has been splitting those targets between Eifert and Gresham all season and should Gresham miss additional time, Eifert could explode for fantasy owners. If you’re playing in a shallow league (12 teams or fewer), he’s definitely a waiver target this week should you be lacking at the position.

Where’s the Beef, Ellington?

Just after Week 9, fantasy owners were assured by Cardinals coach Bruce Arians that Andre Ellington was going to see between 15 and 20 touches per game and while he had just 11 carries, he did see four targets in the passing game. Had he caught them all, we would have had reached our touch-minimum. But why are we just getting the bare minimum? He out-produced that tomato can Rashard Mendenhall by 13 yards on two fewer carries and added two catches for 18 yards to Mendenhall’s one catch for nine. Is Mendenhall’s ability to get stuffed at the line of scrimmage when he runs between the tackles that important? Do we not think that Ellington is equally capable of said stuffing? Something tells me Mendenhall has some illicit photos of his coach because that’s really the only way I can imagine that he keeps using him in that backfield.

T-Rich is Poor

Officially, the over/under on the number of emails I’m going to get this week asking if Trent Richardson should be dropped is at 165. Seriously, each and every week that passes with this moron racking up 60 rushing yards or less (that’s every week, mind you), I get a barrage of emails asking what to do with him. Well, let me think for a moment. Hmmmm. He’s averaging 6.1 fantasy points per game in standard leagues, has just one week with double digit points, and is losing work to Donald Brown. What do you think you should do with him? I said it before and I’ll say it again – the best Alabama running back in the NFL is in Green Bay, not Cleveland Indianapolis. Dump him.

The Foles Factor

Chip Kelly and the Eagles have quite the dilemma coming their way, no? Nick Foles may not have lit it up for 400-plus yards and seven touchdowns this week, but a mistake-free afternoon of 228 yards and three touchdowns ain’t nothing to thumb your nose at, kid. Michael Vick, whom Kelly is extremely fond of, is likely to be out another week with his hamstring issue, but even if he were to play, how do you bench Foles after his recent run of games? He works well with the offense, yields to the running game when he has to, and he and No. 1 wide receiver DeSean Jackson are very much on the same page. Not to mention, what he brings out in Riley Cooper. With Vick under center, Cooper is averaging 1.6 fantasy points per game (standard scoring). With Foles, he’s averaging 23. Perhaps the ol’ Kenny Chesney incident isn’t such a dead issue? I don’t mean to stir the pot here, but if there’s truth to the rumor that dog-loving defenders have been hitting Vick with a little something extra, perhaps Vick is deliberately looking the other way when Cooper is out there on the field with him. Just sayin’. If the goal is to win games and get as much out of the team as you can, then sticking with Foles seems to make the most sense.

Bad Bad Andre Brown

He is not from the South Side of Chicago. He is not from the baddest part of town. To my knowledge, no one calls him ‘Treetop Lover”. He doesn’t drive a custom Continental nor does he have an Eldorado too. Anmd as far as I know, he does not have a 32-gun in a pocket for fun, nor does he have a razor in his shoe. But what he does have is the ability to bring the running game back to New York and that’s just what Andre Brown is doing. Tom Coughlin said he wanted to bring him along slowly but after watching that giant meatsack Peyton Hillis cough up the ball the first time he touched it, Coughlin was more than happy to give Brown 30 carries and 3 targets. The running back handsomely rewarded his coach and those fantasy owners itching to get him into their lineups and it’s all going to start opening up after that. There’s obviously still a bit of concern regarding Eli Manning’s accuracy issues, but hopefully the ease of having a ground game to fall back on will help him relax and stop making stupid decisions.  

Packin’ It In

Just how many quarterbacks can one team go through in less than a week’s time? The city of Green Bay wants to know as a clown car of quarterbacks pulls into the parking lot of Lambeau for this week’s game against the Giants. Aaron Rodgers is down for 4-6 weeks with a fractured collarbone, Seneca Wallace went down with a groin injury and before you start praising Scott Tolzien, keep in mind that there was an undisclosed injury that put him on the sidelines during the preseason and cost him the third-string job in San Francisco. Now the word is that they’re bringing back Matt Flynn for a workout. Does anyone have Vince Young’s number?


Welcome back Roddy White. Sure he had just one catch for 20 yards on four targets, but baby steps, people. Let him ease back in. And while you’re sitting there wondering if he’ll have any value for the rest of the season, allow me to direct you to the schedule that shows Atlanta facing Buffalo, Green Bay and Washington in Weeks 13, 14 and 15. That’s your fantasy playoffs right there.

Beware of False Prophets

Before you go blowing your waiver priority or remaining FAAB budget on Mark Ingram, ask yourself this: How much work has he received throughout the year and would he have received 14 carries had the Saints not been blowing out the Cowboys as bad as they were? Probably not.

Bumps and Bruises – Key Injuries Around the NFL

Jake Locker, QB TEN – Could be done for the season with a possible Lisfranc fracture in his foot.

Jay Cutler, QB CHI – First the groin, now a high ankle sprain. Maybe the bench was a better spot for him this week.

Steve Johnson, WR BUF – Apparently it’s a strain, not a tear, but it could keep him out for Week 11.

Michael Floyd, WR ARI – Suffered a dislocated shoulder early on in Week 10 and never returned. Going to be listed as questionable.

Tony Gonzalez, TE ATL – A toe injury had him hobbling around after Sunday’s loss. If he goes down then it just might be time to steer clear of Matt Ryan.

Vernon Davis, TE SF – Suffered a concussion in the second quarter and was done for the day. Could very well miss Week 11 which puts Vance McDonald on the map…sort of.

Howard Bender has been covering fantasy sports for over a decade on a variety of web sites. You can find his personal musings on and for questions, thoughts or comments, you can follow him on Twitter at @rotobuzzguy or email him at


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About Howard Bender

Howard Bender is a Managing Editor at Fantasy Alarm, Co-Host of the Fantasy Alarm podcast and Co-Host of Fantasy Sports Tonight on SiriusXM Fantasy Sports Radio. Follow him on Twitter at @rotobuzzguy and on the RotobuzzGuy Facebook page. You can also email him directly at

Howard Bender on Twitter

@nsegall25 @FantasyJudgment @FantasyAlarm I'd actually go with Smith. I don't trust Cam's back to hold up

@TheFantasyExec @DaTrueGuru @FantasyAlarm But who needs talk? Let's just play. Pick the site. Week 17. I'm in.

@TheFantasyExec @DaTrueGuru @FantasyAlarm My wins are there and if I recall it was you who shouted at me first, no?